Author Topic: For All The Newfies In Da House....... (Read 2543 times)

Chris · « **on:** August 06, 2004, 06:43:04 PM »

A young man named Mike applied for an engineering position at a
Newfoundland firm based in St, John's.

A Mainlander applied for the same job and both
applicants, having the same qualifications, were asked to take a test by the
department manager.

Upon completion of the test both men had only missed one of the questions.
The manager went to Mike and said, Thank you for your interest, but we've
decided to give the Mainlander the job.\"

\"And why would you be doing that? asked Mike. \"We both gat 9 questions
correct. This bein The Rock and me being a Newfie I should gat the jab!\"

\"We have made our decision not on the correct answers, but on the
question you missed.\"

\"And just how would one incorrect answer be better than the other?\"

\"Simple,\" replied the manager. \"On question # 5, the Mainlander put down,
'I don't know.' You put down 'Needer do I.'\"

silas · « **Reply #1 on:** August 06, 2004, 10:51:28 PM »

i's the buy that builds the boot,
and i's the buy that sails 'er,
i's the buy that catches the fish,
and brings 'er home to lizer.

moni · « **Reply #2 on:** August 07, 2004, 01:58:33 AM »

Hey
I'm not on pogey,
and I'm not married to my sister.
I don't eat codfish three times a day,
well that's cos there ain't no more cod fish left.
I don't own a boat or a sou'wester,
but I can see a boat from me window.
I don't drink screech,
at least not before noon on a weekday anyways.
I don't know Gordon Pincent, or Mary Walsh, or Jimmy Flynn, or Rick Mercer,
but I watch This Hour Has 22 Minutes every week eh.
I got a premier named Brian Tobin,
he went to war with Spain over somethin' called a turbot,
Ain't sure what a turbot is actually,
but I'm damned if I'm gonna let any guy from Spain come and take them away from me.
I ain't the by that builds the boats,
and I ain't the by that sails 'em,
but like I said before I can see a boat from me window eh.
I don't dance a jig everytime I hear Celtic music,
but I'll do dat 'karaoke' thing if I got enough Black Forest Beers in me.
I'm still pissed off at Prince Edward Island,
for buildin that there bridge and not buildin' one out to the rock, them stupid spudheads.
And even though he ain't really a Newfie,
I think Stompin Tom Conors should run for Prime Minister.
Newfoundland is the oldest settlement in North America,
and the youngest province in the confederation,
Oh my grandfather's still pissed off about dat one,
you don't even wanna talk about Joey Smallwood to grampa.
And even though I lives in Fort McMurray,
Lord thunderin' Jesus,
I still thinks that Newfoundland is the best darn province in the country.
My name is Buddy,
and I is a Newfoundlander.

(I Am A Newfoundlander, brought to you by
Bob and Dean's Twisted Tunes, Rock 101 Vancouver)

slugbug · « **Reply #3 on:** August 07, 2004, 10:42:03 AM »

Hey, my Grandma was a Newfie.

Black-Back · « **Reply #4 on:** August 07, 2004, 11:05:01 AM »

I worked with a Newfie once........ :mullet:

jason_hamilton · « **Reply #5 on:** August 07, 2004, 11:17:58 AM »

I married one.
Makes for fine in-laws.

James Buchan · « **Reply #6 on:** August 07, 2004, 12:50:26 PM »

I have 2 newfie neighbors - man can they drink!

Shane · « **Reply #7 on:** August 07, 2004, 01:30:35 PM »

Nobody can out drink a Newfie.. NOBODY!!

silas · « **Reply #8 on:** August 07, 2004, 06:43:51 PM »

Quote

Nobody can out drink a Newfie.. NOBODY!!

wrongo.

i have. a newfie buddy and i made a road trip in my 56 to the gorge in washinton to see dave mathews, santana and a few other bands. not only did i out drink him. i out smoked him. we were both about equal for the first night, but by saturday i had come out on top. the details are hazy, but if there had been an awards ceremony, i would have been at the top of the podium. :lol:

come to think of it. there was a green & white split bus (11 or 13 window) from bc that we ran into down there. my car was there parked in the camp ground and the split bus owner had recognized the bc plates and decided to start the vw camp canada. this must have been 4 or so years ago. anybody here used to own a bus that fits that description?

surgerypending · « **Reply #9 on:** August 08, 2004, 05:22:55 PM »

Yep...west coast newfie here!!

lora · « **Reply #10 on:** August 08, 2004, 06:39:39 PM »

Quote

come to think of it. there was a green & white split bus (11 or 13 window) from bc that we ran into down there. my car was there parked in the camp ground and the split bus owner had recognized the bc plates and decided to start the vw camp canada. this must have been 4 or so years ago. anybody here used to own a bus that fits that description?

this bus???

that was my baby

silas · « **Reply #11 on:** August 08, 2004, 09:51:18 PM »

well shit lora, thats the bus. thats my blue 56 rag and my buddy coreys green & white highroof with the red maple leaf painted on it.

thats a damn cool pic. the bc vws were rollin hard at the gorge that weekend.

lora · « **Reply #12 on:** August 08, 2004, 10:20:57 PM »

Quote

well shit lora, thats the bus. thats my blue 56 rag and my buddy coreys green & white highroof with the red maple leaf painted on it.

thats a damn cool pic. the bc vws were rollin hard at the gorge that weekend.

That week I drove to the gorge, for the sat night, then went to westport for sunday and drove back to bc on monday, daily drove it to work and everywhere else and then drove down to oregon the next weekend and toured all over the back routes before making going back home. I drove over 1000 miles in a week and it was still kicking ass!!! I put over 10,000 miles on my bus in the first four months I owned it. Nothing is better than a road trip in an aircooled vdub

was it you who was going on about wanting to jizz on my bus?? that weekend was crazy.

moni · « **Reply #13 on:** August 09, 2004, 12:23:05 PM »

Quote

was it you who was going on about wanting to jizz on my bus??

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!! lmfao!!

Chris · « **Reply #14 on:** August 09, 2004, 01:11:36 PM »

So if I say I am a newfie then I can jizz on your bus? Thats an interesting idea.

MENTAL NOTE : No more newfie jokes on forum.

silas · « **Reply #15 on:** August 09, 2004, 05:10:00 PM »

Quote

was it you who was going on about wanting to jizz on my bus??

sometimes it's a shame that this forum is moderated. i could have alot of fun with that one. but alas, i'm not into getting banned or getting threads deleted.

anywho. i think moni's making fun of your bus. i mean, was the bus not jizz worthy? the way you speak of it, it sure sounds like it was. i'm sure there was alot of oohing and ahhing on my part. i mean shit, it's an early, lowered 11 window bus. it dont get much sweeter.

unless it's a deluxe and has 12 more windows.

moni · « **Reply #16 on:** August 10, 2004, 09:16:43 AM »

trust me silas, i spent too many nights smooged in that bus to even think of making fun of it.

i just think it's a crazy coincidence. i remember lora telling me after she got home from the gorge about some dude she camped beside who was totally drooling over the van. and, yes, mary jane was definitely \"jizz worthy.\" :lol:

lora · « **Reply #17 on:** August 11, 2004, 02:31:03 PM »

Quote

trust me silas, i spent too many nights smooged in that bus to even think of making fun of it.

dude, she was one of the VERY FEW select individuals I let drive my bus!!!! and one of two people i would have let \"borrow\" marijane without me being there.... although the shag carpet and the slutty squirrel in the bus was defintely worth making fun of :ph34r:. It was definitely \"jizz worthy\" :blush:

moni · « **Reply #18 on:** August 11, 2004, 03:59:06 PM »

omg, i totally forgot about our slut!

may she rest in peace, that fine, libidinous squirrell...