The DR (double relay) is on the left side of the fuel tank access panel, just below the resistor block. With all respect Bruce removing the solenoid trigger wire will also disable the DR for cranking as that's the wire it gets it's start signal from, disconnecting all the spade terminal wires from the starter and connecting them together off the starter would work though. Correct on depressing the flap in the AFM though, if the key is in the run position and the black wire laying along the left side of the engine (the one with the backup light fuse in it) is connected to #15 on the coil the pump should run when the flap is opened. Connect a test light or meter between the pump terminals to see if it's getting power, there's no carved in stone description of which one is +, you'll have to clean it up and look for the markings.
Whatever you do Bct please replace all your fuel lines with good metric sized FI rated hose and use the proper FI band clamps.